Thoughts of the Day.

I just want to live in a world where the skies are not polluted with chemtrails,where I can question the government and the OBVIOUS flaws right in front of our faces without being immediately shut down and called paranoid. I wish we didn’t have the mainstream media suffocating us with pointless ideals of self and what is important. I wish we understood feeding everyone on the planet is more important than iPhones and material bullshit.  I wish when I was out in the world I could see people talking to each other rather than ALL being sucked into their screens like some sort of zombies. 

I wish people paid attention to what is going on around them. Like the fact that our food is poisoned by giants like Monsanto, and our water has flouride in it which is destroying our pineal glands (our third eye, our ability to see beyond the veil)! I wish people saw beyond party lines and realized they are a way to divide and conquer the masses. Do you REALLY see any change when we have a Democrat or a Republican in office? Or do you see the same bullshit we have always? 

As far as I can see we are still ruled by our lord and masters. WE are still the peasants who are taken advantage of, who are blind to the bars which surround all of us!!!!! 

I wish people all gardened, and loved each other. I wish we could live in a world of happiness rather than one of greed, hate, war! All these things which benefit the elite. All these things are not done because we the world NEED them. Despite what you are made to believe it is possible to have a better world. It is possible. We can make the changes necessary, not without challenge of course, but it can happen. 

You are not an ignorant fool. You are not limited because you are human, and you are certainly not imperfect. You do not need to be anything but yourself. You do not need all these material objects to make you worthwhile. YOU HAVE AN INFINITE UNIVERSE at your FINGERTIPS! Do you realize this? Do you realize you have the power to change the world? To be whoever you want to be? TO be good? To bring unconditional love to yourself and all those around you? YES YOU!     You do not have to go along with the madness simply because the madness exists! IT IS WRONG, and I believe deep down many know this.

That is the problem. Those select few who run our world have made us believe we are insignificant, and deserving of the horror that rules our lives. That is a lie! Listen to your spirit telling you there is more to this life and this world than living in sadness and compliance for the darkness. 




i always compare people to my friends at home. don’t get me wrong, i appreciate everything my friends here have for me and i was love them forever for that; but when you’re spent 7 years with the exact same group of friends it’s hard not to compare. i always wish i was back with them and i was tell people that they’re the ones who get who i really am. but then i facetime a bunch of them tonight while they’re getting ready and i can feel something’s changed. it started with them listening to a completely different type of music to what they used to, then with them having different sayings and conversation topics. i couldn’t help but wonder what they must think of me now? do they think i’ve changed? they didn’t even speak to me for half the time i was on, and sat listening to their conversations. i guess i just thought that time would stand still while i was gone, that they wouldn’t grow up… but they have and now i’m scared that they won’t like me, because i truly haven’t grown up that much. if anything, i feel i’ve just gone backwards. my mind’s a mess. i don’t know who i actually am anymore. 

Happy Easter!

Easter has a warmer glow,
Spring, a brighter touch,
Because I’m sharing them with you…
The one I love so much.
These Happy Easter wishes
Are especially for you;
A great big hug & a few light kisses
Thrown in for good measure too.
Have a super holiday
And know that I’m thinking of you;
Because you’re especially nice to know,
And because I just wanted to !

Happy Easter !!

I treat people like chocolate bunnies at Easter!
I bite their heads off.
Happy Easter.


5 Steps to Achieve Happiness

1. You have to let go of all envy and insecurities when it comes to other people. You have to create the mindset that everyone is equally as awesome, despite looks, talent, intelligence and etc. Let go of thinking that other people are better than you and start loving yourself just as you are. 

2. Start believing in yourself. Your achievements are only limited by the amount of effort installed. Have the confidence to accomplish whatever makes you happy. Think of all the things you love and enjoy, and keep doing them. Try not to get intimidated by others. Believe in yourself and have the faith in trusting yourself in being capable of anything.

3. Locate your insecurities and flaws. When you start locating the small things that dissatisfy yourself, you begin to surprisingly love them. That way, when someone else points them out what harm does it have on you? Nothing. 

4. Stay motivated. Create to-do lists and build small personal projects for yourself. It feels good to constantly be working towards something, pushing yourself forward. 

5. Be inspired. Go on the internet, listen to music, watch videos, meet with friends, read blogs, magazines, books, dance, sing, do a sport, go shopping. Or, spend time by yourself to reflect and contemplate. Make yourself busy by doing activities that you enjoy. Fill your life with components that make your life valuable. 


           I don’t know what to do. I have felt this hopeless only one other time in my life; and I have prayed that I would never feel this way again. God must not have heard. Where the last tragedy hit hard and fast like a train; this one is approaching much slower. I can see the train; it is just taking off, yet to build up a proper head of steam. I still have time. There was nothing I could do to make it right last time. The damage had already been done, he was already gone. All I could do was stand there, hold his sister while she cried, and save my own tears for another time. I can only imagine the hell that he had been going through leading him to do it. We weren’t close enough for me to have a real impact on him. At least that is what I tell myself. I still hate myself for not trying; I didn’t even attempt to talk to him about anything. He was family, and though nobody will ever believe it, I failed him. While I’m being honest I might as well admit that I am failing his sister as well. I will not fail my little brother. I will not let him lose. I will fight for the little shit and I will do it with all that I’ve got because I am not losing another brother.